Sunday, April 24, 2011

K is for Kicking and Screaming

I went to visit my mother today, in honor of Easter. I brought her a lovely purple duckling that was dressed up like a bunny. I spent the hour showing her pictures on my phone, which included shots from hiking, from my garden, and from my classroom. She remembers enough to know that I like to garden and that I am a Montessori teacher. She bugged everyone sitting near us with my pictures. She scared me at first because she had to stare at me for a good thirty seconds before it registered who I was. But she was really having a good day.

I am glad that she has calmed down so much. It was hard for me to watch a nurse come over and give her her meds. Then Mom got all emotional at how nice it was that someone has taken the time to get the medication that she needs. I am also grateful that she is somewhere that she can get the meds that she needs. She just wasn't taking care of herself and could have gotten very sick. And one of her meds is supposed to help slow down the progress of the Alzheimer's.

To look at her sitting so nicely it is hard to believe that this is the same woman who was yelling at me all during Christmas break. There is something in me that triggers Mom's angry side. Perhaps it is my authoritative stance that I have developed as a teacher. I remember to not take it personally, but I still alternate between annoyance/hurt at being yelled at and laughing hysterically at the "Exorcist voice."

I also kept trying to picture her when she first arrived at the facility. She was not happy to be there and kept trying to leave. Apparently one day her ankle bracelet malfunctioned and she made it out the door. It took three people to wrestle her back in, kicking and screaming. It also hurts my heart a bit to think of how terrified she must have been. Now she has gotten over it and loves her vacation home. I just hope that when she transfers she can avoid that kicking and screaming phase and embrace her new life.

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